"A plan, an idea, a chance"

Dear Mr. Cloud,

I'm sorry for not posting new blogs lately and not keeping anyone updated. I haven't been feeling like myself. I did not feel like updating, I don't think I'm going to use Xanga anymore, I can't play any songs on there. I don't know if I still like Kurt because like I was sitting in my room on my bed, thinking, yes, just thinking. I came to a point where I was in my own world, while I was in my own world I realized I didn't really like Kurt a lot, but I do not know if I should try. I think that Kristine is just Kurt's close friend. Since she's a senior I don't think they would go out, I mean it is possible, but I just don't think they would. So Yesterday was Christmas, it was alright. I didn't shed a tear. I know the past should stay in the past and the future be how I make it uring the present, so I'm going to try to make next year better. My New Year's resolution is to bring the family back together. It might be hard, I might be alone in this, but I know for a fact that I will try because I do care. All my cousins and sister is complaining on how the family is seperated and it's hurtful. They are not doing anything about it, not at all. I', going to step in now and try to change the conflict of the family. I have a plan, an idea, a chance. I might not accomplish what I want but at least I tried and if I fail I wil just get back on my feet and try again, I won't fall back, won't let failure get me down, I still have a chance while I'm still living. I ave support, I have ideas, I have wants, and I need, need this to work. I will try anything and everything to make it happen, I want a happy family that I once had. I feel terrible not appreciating it, but now I know, now I know how important it is to me. I'm glad I have great friends, so I won't try anything nothing at all to lose them. I love them so I will cherish them, but if they don't deserve to be cherish then they're not my friend. Sometimes I feel like forgiving Trinity, but I know for a fact it would be a mistake, she won't learn. I try to help her, it just doesn't work. & She used my trust, my friends, and anything else possible. I don't hate her, but I don't like her for a fact. I just don't like her. I want good grades this new years! :D I want to go to a UC w/ Jenny. I also wanted to live together with Michelle, Jenny, and Jodie, but I don't know where they are going for college. I guess no need to think now, we will keep in touch when that time comes, for now we can just have fun and love each other. It's just college, it won't ruin this friendship, right? Of course.(: